Kimberley’s Birthday Party !!! 2008 

It’s that exciting time of year again

When

Kimberley

Has yet another super

Birthday Bash

 

I know you’ve all been checking your email and calling.

I have finally made up my mind.

 

This years super Birthday Party Day

Will start whenever

Kimberley rolls out of bed and skillfully makes her way to Timmies for a breakfast sandwich, with and extra egg, before 11 of course

And then to Starbucks for her

usual hearts, kisses and happy face iced coffee

Now with half sugar free mocha and half regular mocha

 a splash of non fat milk and extra ice 

 

The new Diva Headquarters has moved

Not because people were stalking me but

Because they sold my other house

Those bastards !!!!!!!!!

Now im in

Queens Park

 

Ok not in the park literally 

But you know around the outside pretty damn close.

 

Kimberley also has her own island now and is

Inviting you, of course, on March 1^st

                                               To join her on her island while we                                              

Sip pineapple drinks from her

Super blender, that makes

Her look like a bartender

And

Of course cookies and tapas

Aaaaaaaaaaand

Her famous humus and bruschetta

That’s still not spelled right

The island is actually located in

Kimberley’s kitchen

At 5 PM you can come over !!!

Call for the address or you’ll never find me!

Or you could just drive around and yell my name like some freakish ex’s of mine…..but I hate that,,, really, dont

After all the homemade heart felt cards are opened

And after all the flowers are in their vases

And all the jewellery is put on

 

The limo, with extra vodka of course, hopefully black

Will show up at the Diva Den to take us toooooo

(This is the exciting part) 

The Lions Den at 7:30 PM

Saturday March 1^st, 2008

Which will be turned quickly into the Diva Den

after I show up around 8

 

Don’t worry I have feather boas for everybody…

The Lions Den

is a sports bar in the Boulevard Casino in Coquitlem. 

You know the

Red Robinson Theatre Place

. Close to a busy highway central to everyone.

There’s some live band playing that looks fun and I hear they have a huge dance floor

Then again if your doing jello shooters with me in the limo

You wont care where were going.

 

Now the motor home from 2007 was fun

But

Kimberley didn’t realize that sleeping in the motor home would be so damn cold

so this year she was going to rent a hotel room.

But since she has toured extensively and had to stay in hotels so much she now hates them

unless she absolutely has to .

So to avoid the freezing drama she is going to just go home

 

Unless I find some cool yummy person

Ditch you

And forget I even had a party

 

Hope you can make it

Kimberley

 

PS Don’t forget my card !!!!!!

Musical ones no longer accepted….

but singing telegrams are ok

To the people that were going to put an ad in the paper wishing me a happy 40^th  

I’m onto you.

 

Posted: March 24th, 2008 under Uncategorized.
Comments: none

So if you don’t know me, here’s the deal.  I hate games.  Head games, board games, video games, sport games, card games, etc.  I’m sure they call them board games for a reason.  I’m good for maybe one Scrabble game, one Back Gammon game and maybe one Crib game per decade, but only if I really like you.  Bingo won’t happen ever again, bowling may make me go into a comma. I have the attention span of maybe a minute, so if I haven’t been swept off my feet intellectually by then, you’ve lost me.

 

This makes this next blog, the funniest thing ever for me.  I’m not sure what is more annoying video games or the noise they make but I just can’t play them at all.  In fact I don’t watch them ever because they’re not around me much so the graphics are freaking me out.  Amazing.

 

Yesterday I went to my friends place and she’s a gamer.  That’s was a whole other term in my day but anyway, she has this X Box.  I’ve heard of Guitar Hero but never seen it till my visit over there.  My son was of course drooling and patiently waiting for her to finish some 8 minute song on expert.  I was nagged until I gave it a try.   Now me with any kind of modern technology is fun enough to watch but this was freaking the most fun I’ve had in a very long time. 

 

They explained it to me and then loaded me up.  I picked Talk Dirty To Me by Poison,  cause its sounds cool, its got a good beat and hey you can dance to it.  I missed and got booed out of my own show the first time.  Then I had this vendetta thing happen and I had to get it, or at least try to get my audience back loving me.  ( They were chanting when I came out, that’s all im saying!!)

 

So I try again on practice and people were leaving the room.  I guess it was too painful to watch.  Then, by some weird weird revolution I got it.  And I was so excited I nearly smashed the thing lol.  So hears the deal, if you’re doing well and you’re a beginner, you can’t blink,  or you’ll miss a note and ruin your streak.  

That’s lingo~

 

So there I am, trying to get Star Power lol which apparently I don’t know what to do with once I get it and freaking laughing my face off.   I was told by the youngens that you have to blink on the long notes, which duh, makes super good sense.   I had tears rolling down my face from not blinking for three minutes.  

 

So now,im one of the coolest Moms in the world.  I got 89% before I could put the damn thing down.  It’s so much damn fun I think technically it should be illegal.  So ya,if you see me around and want my autograph now, just ask nice.  And if you have Guitar Hero, CALL ME.  Im good for about 4 songs and im kind of working on Welcome to the Jungle and I need some practice time.  I may challenge Slash even.  I’m going to need a bigger arena for my ego, but for now, I have to go, my band is waiting for me somewhere.

 

Oh and by the way, its official, I Rock!!!!!

 

 

Posted: March 24th, 2008 under Uncategorized.
Comments: none